Can I just tell you? I have been cranky for two months. It was brought to my attention shortly after Thanksgiving that
I may be a touch self-centered. Now, I’ve had my eye on a couple of different “prizes” for many, many years.
Some realistic, others, maybe not so much… For example, I believe wholeheartedly that I am meant for stardom…
Am I self-centered? Narcissistic? Or just plain, unrealistic? Maybe a little bit of all three.
I try to offset that with trying to be as kind as I can to my fellow
man. Typically, that involves having a little too much compassion and empathy for a meat-head guy, sometimes referred to as
a “meatball.” I can’t even tell you how many times I’ve thought to myself, “If
my friend was telling me the things this guy is telling or showing me, about someone she were dating, what would be my advice?”
The honest answer is usually, “Run!”
This brings me to another “prize,” a partner. I’ve mentioned I am the first born
of an immigrant mother and I’m the only one of her brood that is perpetually unattached. Am I self-centered? Maybe a
little but, so what? Who isn’t?! Is that the reason I’m single? I don’t think so.
I was invited to Hawaii for a romantic
2-week vacation with a guy I had been dating for approximately one month. Now, I know that any level headed
woman would think twice and weigh options. “Do I trust this man? Is this man someone I can “live” with for
2 weeks? Is there real potential in this relationship?” When all the answers to those questions start with “N”
then it’s probably a good idea to decline. Of course, I said, “sure!”
Why? Many reasons. The two obvious: adventure and free trip. The not
so obvious reason: the relief that maybe “this one” could work out. Maybe all those red flags were just part of
a deep fear of picking the wrong partner… Or, could it have been because it’s possible that I might really be
a little too picky. (That’s something that has been pointed out more than a couple of times in the past.)
I saw the movie “He’s
Just Not That Into You” with a couple of perpetual singletons the other night and followed it up with the comedian that
wrote it; then watched a piece on the Discovery Channel called “The Science of Sex Appeal” which I recorded to
refer back as necessary. Apparently, our mothers were right about not chasing a guy. According to the insightful movie and
comedian, we should listen to our gut and there are plenty of fish in the sea. Don’t focus on the idiot who doesn’t
do it for you in the first couple of dates just because you don’t want to be single anymore. (That leads to crankiness.)
Also, the “Science
of Sex Appeal” teaches us that if you go out with minimal clothes while you’re ovulating you won’t be single
for long. I would imagine this poses a problem for conservative and slightly modest women, like me.
So, there it is, I am not self-centered,
I just don’t show enough skin. I’ll let you know if it works when it warms up a bit.
